I woke up this morning with an underlying feeling of anxiety. I couldn’t pinpoint exactly where it was coming from. There was nothing particularly unnerving in my current life, so why was this visceral gnawing tightening my chest and leaking into my gut? I wasn’t sure. I hoped my morning walk would bring some clarity or at least some icy air to freeze it out, but no such luck. It was just as strong once I returned, refilled my coffee and sat down at the desk.
Before I could move on with my day, I knew I had to take some type of action, so I decided to employ a method of journaling that evolved over years of daily writing.
Whenever a feeling or decision has me stumped, I take out my pen and paper, scroll the question at the top and then begin free writing the answer as fast as possible, without critique or concern for the content or style. I write whatever comes to mind, knowing that I can burn or shred the pages if they reveal something I don’t want anyone else to see. This frees me up to say whatever I want in order to get to the truth. And the truth is always what ends up on the page.
When I first discovered this technique, I used it daily. I took the approach of coach to client, therapist to patient, and friend to friend. No matter who was in dialogue, I could always sense two distinct voices surfacing, one asking the question and one answering it. The questions were insightful and on track but the answers were what surprised me the most. Each time I began to write, the message would pick up speed and ideas and solutions would come flowing out onto the page from somewhere deep inside. It was like discovering a gold mine or an oil reservoir. Once it was tapped, the treasured solutions flowed out abundantly and easily.
This type of journaling helped to guide me through some important decisions and provided insights that may not have been uncovered otherwise or would have taken years. I called the technique “The Inner Coach” and it became my go-to strategy for solving unanswered soul and life questions.
Recently, I came upon a book which outlines a similar method called writing down your soul by Janet Conner. It is a wonderful book and goes a few steps further to help the reader assign an identity to the voice and also provides prompts to foster deeper awareness, meaning, soul exploration, imagination, and creativity.
After completing the recommended meditation and journaling, I discovered that I was harboring a fear and uncertainty about the events of this past week, the state of American politics, the instability and fractured nature of our country, the continued loss resulting from Covid 19, our injured economy, the growing unrest and persistent hate. What I was feeling in the center of my chest was a result of a connection to the collective consciousness or communal heart (as I like to call it), the most extreme of which wasn’t happening to me directly. Yet, I could sense a piece of the greater suffering and destruction that is part of today’s reality.
My inner voice suggested that I meditate to a sound healing video in 639Hz (a frequency that addresses the heart chakra). It also guided me to do another journal entry afterwards, this time focusing on what I want to manifest in 2021 and particularly what I’d like to put out into the Universe as a focus for this month’s new moon (which occurs on Jan 13 at 12 a.m).
After following the guidelines that came forth on the page and writing out my wish for more peace, collaboration, and love, I feel much better. The ball of anxiety has been lifted and my thoughts are where I want them to be, focused on positive change. I am now able to move on with my day, in a heightened state of clarity and hope and with the belief that the work I have done on myself will extend out to help heal the collective condition.